Posts tagged "sex addiction counselor"

Powerful Habits Can Be Changed

Every day, every human being, performs routine behaviors that our brains have wired as Powerful Habits. Habits are rituals and behaviors that we accomplish automatically. These are activities that we do without giving much effort or thought such as brushing our teeth, using a spoon or fork to eat, getting dressed in the morning, and driving the same route to work every day. Habits free up the brain’s resources to carry out more complex tasks such as problems solving or focusing on what to cook for (more…)

Porn Overstimulates Your Brain

If there was a contest to find the best way to control a person’s will, internet pornography would win 2nd place next to crack cocaine. Online pornography is much different than the porn magazines of the 1970’s and 1980’s. Those magazines of the pre-internet era was similar to light beer, while the internet pornography of today is pure grain alcohol “Everclear.” Using porn overstimulates your brain. (more…)

Sex Addict Full Disclosure: Taking Responsibility

A major aspect of a sex addict’s recovery is the willingness  to take full responsibility for his past behaviors and harm. The basics of a Sex Addict Full Disclosure are confession, repentance, and making an amends. Sex addicts in a relationship also need to show his/her partner remorse for the harm and damage done to the partner. (more…)

Overtime, the Sexual Addiction Self-Obsession sets into motion the addictive cycle and the thinking of the Sex Addict becomes increasing more selfish and self-centered. Internally, his attitude closes off to the reality of his behaviors to the point in which he can no longer look at himself or the harm he is causing. He may blame those closet to him or the world outside as reasons for his actions. “It isn’t my fault!” All he can see are the inadequacies, wrongs, and failures of others. (more…)

Spiritual Sexual Addiction Recovery

For someone struggling with sexual addiction, the sexual fantasy or sexual behavior was the original “solution” to the real underlying problem that is at the core of the addict’s life. What the sex addict found in the beginning is that the addiction “worked.” Meaning, the behaviors or fantasy numbed, medicated, and blocked the pain that came out of the real problem. Yet overtime, the addict becomes “tolerated” to the original level of sexual fantasy or behaviors and that leads to wanting or needing “more, better, and different.” (more…)

The childhood of sex addicts are often filled with a memories of being desperately lonely, directionless, and vulnerable. The sex addict’s family-of-origin often lacked nurturing or modeling of how to share needs in a vulnerable but safe environment. The sex addict wasn’t able to rely on, depend on, or turn to the adults in his life to meet his needs so he learned early in life that only he can meet his needs. (more…)

As a sexual addiction counselor, my experience has revealed three sexual addiction identifiers that a client is addicted to sex: tolerance, abstinence, and withdrawal. In the addiction field, these are commonly regarded as being traits that potential addicts show signs of being addicted to a substance, a behavior, or even a mental experience (such as fantasy relationships). (more…)